Forgotten

Tahun Baru. Awal Muharram. They all went to Kemamang today and Mok has been reporting on what they've had every single minute.

"V r in kemamang now... Wow. Dapat pekena micalong. hmmmyum yum"
"Ekgi yana nok wat kek plok"
"Skang weols sedang menikmati jambu tabor asam masin"
"Ekgi mok nok gi makan mihun tomyam kat kedai depan tu. Behnye duk kemamang ey"

...while I was munching on biskut mayat sambil minum air masak. Can you imagine how depressed I am? Sila kasihan.

Minggu depan, jadual harian akan jadi sangat padat. Maka bantuan Horlicks dan Transfer Factor sangat diperlukan. [yes, Mok. dan minyok ikang skali]

Can't wait to get bizzzeyyyy!! Waktu terluang, terbuang. Sekarang baru terkejar sebab masih tak sentuh Criminal cases yang perlu dikhatam sebelum tutorial Isnin ni, masih tak buat research Euthanasia and ethics untuk kelas UNGS, masih belum mula buat notes untuk semua subjek.


Athirah Ali, berhenti jadi procrastinator lah!

p/s: Semalam yani tanya, "Apa azam tahun baru kakak Awal Muharram ni?". I owe her a huge answer. Adei.

Sometimes life can be deceiving

Sudah lah...

I'm not a people person like you. I'm naturally awkward with strangers. I can't make friends easily. That is just not me. I can't simply start a conversation with someone who sits next to me in bus. I feel like I'm making a fool of myself if I did.

I can only go as far as smiling to a complete stranger. Smiling is my idea of communication.


I'm not like you.
Why do you even bother to try to change it, when you should just accept?


Listening to: Better Together - Jack Johnson

Have fun

I want to have fun and make money to have fun

yay!

Teater Natrah semalam amazing walaupun terpaksa memanjangkan leher sekali sekala sebab orang depan tak reti duduk diam + ketinggian diri sendiri tak mengizinkan untuk tonton sambil bersandar. :)

...and I take back my words. Maya Karin memang boleh berlakon.

Goodbye Terengganu,

hello Gombak.

Big city dreams

Here's my theory.

First semester, I tried my best to get into Dean's List because I believe back then that that's what it takes to obtain a scholarship. I really need one because I'm just too shy to ask for money from Ayoh [go ask my friends]. So I study a little bit more than I used to in CFS. and it paid off well, beyond my expectation. But I was wrong, boy I was wrong! Apparently, being in Dean's List doesn't guarantee you a scholarship.

I believe in His rezeki. Maybe it's not my turn, yet.

Semester after that, the subjects got tougher. I still am trying my best because it matters. For me, at least. Still maintain my position in the list. Scholarship? Nah... still not my turn. No response from any.

But I really am grateful for what I have. Treasure the moment, they said. and I did.

Second year; man, it's tough! but I don't feel anything, not as much pressure as I expected. Don't ask me, I don't know why. So I experiment with myself. What if I don't struggle as much as I did for this final? Just this once. What would happen if I don't push myself too much? Just once. The result? Coolio! I didn't fail any subjects! Yes, my GPA drop a little bit but what the heck? That's why it's called an experiment, right? Maybe that's the reason why I don't feel bummed but instead relieved. Call me idiot, call me weird. I'll ignore you, yo!

Don't worry. I'll get back to where I used to be [the give-the-hell-out-of-what-I-got part, that's it] this coming semester. InsyaAllah.

I still believe in His rezeki. Just because I don't get any scholarship, doesn't mean that I don't deserve any. Maybe it is His way of telling me that I'm just not ready for it. Maybe I would waste all the money by buying useless stuff if I got one, instead of viewing it as a responsibility. Perhaps perhaps perhaps.

Kata Ayoh, "Mungkin Allah nak bagi rezeki dekat tempat lain. Bukan sekarang, mungkin masa depan. Never ever give up."

Then, he told me his story. How he got to where he is now, the hardship that he had went through. I'm inspired. I'm motivated. I'm thankful.


Like disney-channel said, 'my dad is better than you dad'! XD

Dream and Awake

What I've been listening to this week:

Try - Asher Brook
Kings and Queens - 30 Seconds to Mars
You're the Storm - the Cardigans
We are Birds - Brighten
I Came All this Way - the Thrills
Funeral Dress - William Fitzsimmons



I seriously need ice cream before college starts.

to breathe is to inspire

I think I've figured something about me. I think I know what my problem is. The one that has been bothering me for quite some time now. Maybe I like being this way. Maybe I'm comfortable being like this. Maybe I like being slightly aloof and reserved.

Anyway.

2 days before going back to college. Still not packing the luggage and most importantly, DA FOOD... Yeah yeah. I buy lots and lots of food every semester and keep a stock under my bed. That's my way of saving my allowance. Since nobody wants to give me any scholarship, I will keep on continuing this bad habit, yo!

Speaking about college. Got the result this morning. Glad that I passed all subjects! Thought I would flunk Criminal, but apparently not! Wee! The ironic part is, I'm freakin' grateful of my result even though the GPA is lower than last semester's.

I should be wasting boxes of tissues and sobbing on bed and cover my face with my blanket, right? But I don't. Not at all.

I'm starting to like tawakal + redha mode. :)

Since the world has been going all crazy about New Moon the movie recently, this is for the ones who allowed Twilight author rob you of your brain cells, your money, and your time. Cheers!